Looking back across sixty-two years, the landscape of friendship reveals itself not in how many people fill the room, but in what remains when the noise settles.
Life moves in seasons, and people naturally drift into different orbits. Work, distance, and daily demands take their toll on our routines. Yet, time and space have a way of revealing what was genuine all along. There are people from years past who may feel distant in the day-to-day, but you know without a shadow of a doubt that if trouble came knocking, you could pick up the phone, and they would be right there on the line.
No awkwardness, no pretense, no lost ground.
“To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven,” the preacher in Ecclesiastes wrote. We accept that seasons change, but a true bond isn’t broken by time or distance.
That kind of enduring connection is rare because it requires a foundation built on complete authenticity, absolute trust, and a total lack of envy.
A true friend is someone in whose presence you can drop the armor. You don’t have to put on a face or work to impress them. They know who you are and what you are—the good, the hard, and everything in between—and they accept you as you are.
Yet, along the way, most of us also cross paths with those who claim to be friends, but secretly harbour envy. Their jealousy becomes abundantly apparent—in the sudden cold shoulder, the subtle withdrawal, or the quiet distance they create when good things happen in your life. Even when denied, that bitter root shows itself. Instead of rejoicing with you, they turn to whispers, talking behind your back to tear down what they envy.
Scripture speaks directly to the destructive weight of that hidden spirit: “Wrath is cruel, and anger is outrageous; but who is able to stand before envy?” (Proverbs 27:4). Jealousy ruins fellowship because it cannot celebrate another’s blessing.
In stark contrast, a true confidant rejoices in your joy and guards your heart when you are vulnerable. When you confide in them, you know your words are safe. They don’t trade your story for attention or run to others with what you’ve shared in confidence. As Proverbs 11:13 reminds us, “A gossip betrays a confidence, but a trustworthy person keeps a secret.” Finding someone with that kind of discretion and pure heart is like finding water in a desert.
It mirrors the heart of the Gospel: to be completely known, deeply understood, and entirely safe.
Scripture reminds us that God places specific people in our lives to anchor us, sifting the temporary and the treacherous from the enduring. “A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.” (Proverbs 18:24)
In over six decades of living, you realize you can count those genuine confidants on very few fingers. But when you have them—those few who love at all times, who harbor no malice, who guard your trust, and who hold up your hands when you are weary—you hold a rare and holy treasure.
Looking over the ledger of a lifetime, you don’t need a crowd. You just need to know that the few who truly hold your heart, and keep it safe, are only a phone call away.
If you have found even one or two souls like that on this journey, consider yourself deeply, richly blessed.
To my confidants—both the old friends who have anchored my past and the new ones who light up my present—those few faithful souls who hold my trust and give me a safe place to simply be myself: you know who you are. I am profoundly, deeply grateful for you.
